Jess is out of office.

I'm sorry, Jess.

Yesterday morning, I declared my manifesto.

My goal is simple: to take a stand for all the CEOs out there that are trying to get some real marketing done, but keep getting blocked by horrible excuses. You know the ones: "I'm on vacation for the first time in 3 years", "I have no budget", "you asked me to focus on 19 other things", "you don't even go here".

(Okay that last one was a Mean Girls reference. But Jess basically is Regina George as far as I'm concerned.)

To no surprise, I was surrounded with overwhelming support. In minutes, actually good marketers were cheering me on with such great ideas & support:


Don't fact-check me on these. They're all (mostly) true. But there was one comment that really stuck with me:


So here's the deal.

I'm gonna prove this whole "social media" thing isn't that hard. You don't need to be a genius. You don't need strategy. It only takes 1 ingredient. #FreeStuff

The first 100 people who fill out the form below and promise to post a pic of their favorite card combination, I'll send a free Marketers Against Humanity deck.

I'm sure Jess had some other plans for this swag. But, meh.

#WorthIt #SoGoodAtThis #CEOsAreTheBest #NaNaNaNaBooBoo

A satirical production.

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